bureaucracy they told me I need my marriage license I don’t but they convinced me I do the picture is bad my face is fat my body is fat it’s lucky I’m beautiful it is not yet time for me to have a REAL ID now I have flimsy paper and a plastic card with voids in it that spell void I took a vacation day, for this? I suppose I don’t want to be invalid for my birthday
Taking the race question off of applications doesn’t help, it makes it so white people can think even less about their role in systematic oppression.
There is box I want banned.
Me? I’m doing my best to provide and share intellectual resources. I’m studying and crying about the past, the atrocities of the present. Feeling sad about how shock dissipates, as the past and present echo, horrors feel predictable. Arguing with friends but mostly avoiding bigots. Writing poetry when I can’t not. Sometimes I protest, but not as much I feel I could. I still have more first-hand experience than most of my ivory tower peers. Honestly, mostly I hide. I hide out of fear of the state / the ugliness of police / the intensity of the feeling of protest and sense of community that overwhelms me. Right now? I hide because there is a plague. Often, I vote and worry I’m doing nothing.